Good Morning My Precious Diamonds!  I've got some questions to ask you.  Take a couple minutes and answer them to yourself.  Be honest!  When your husband confides in you, do you keep it to yourself, or do you share the "secret" with one or two of your closest friends?  When he asks you to do something, do you do it?  When he asks you not to do something, do you stop doing it?  When he shares something with you, good or bad, do you run to your mom and tell her....even if you knew he would not want her to know?  Do you pray for him?  Do you respect him?  Do you go about your day with his best interest in mind?  Now, don't go freaking out if your answers don't paint a perfect picture of you.  It does not mean you are not a good wife.  It takes time in a marriage to get to a place where you understand exactly what each person needs, and what our role is in providing that need.  Each family is different.  Maybe your husband doesn't mind if you share everything with your friends and mother.......but please take the time to find out.  Or what about respect?  This is a hard one.  I knew for years that I was supposed to respect Tom, and I thought I did.  However, whenever I would hear or read something about respecting your husband, I discovered that I did the things I needed to do, but in my heart, I did not truly respect him.  Somehow I still thought I knew all the answers.  Once I realized that I didn't fully respect him, I had a lot more work to do.  I had to study and pray and purpose to remove past hurts, disappointments, and experiences, so that I could move forward and give our marriage the clean slate the Lord gives us every time we fall short.  It wasn't easy.  I cried a lot.  I yelled a lot.  But today, this morning, I can say with a pure heart that I love and respect my man, and that feeling is worth the work I did to get here.  There is nothing worse than being in a marriage where you feel like you don't exist, like you don't matter.  I used to say it was more lonely being married than it was being alone.  That is very, very sad.  I used to blame Tom for that feeling.  However, when I asked myself the questions I asked you, I realized it was not all him.  I was equal in creating the atmosphere of our marriage.  I worked hard and didn't quit, and now I am more blessed by Tom than I could have ever imagined!  Don't get me wrong.  We are not perfect.  I still have days when I feel cold  and irritated towards him.  There are days when he seems selfish and self centered.  But hey, these days are few and far between.  Also, knowing that each other truly has your best interest at heart, helps you get through those days instead of allowing the devil to turn them into weeks and months.  If you don't like your answers, the good news is, you can change them!  Make your requests to the Lord.   Ask Him to help you be the wife He intended you to be.  There are many resources available to you to help in any area you may be struggling with.  It may take some work, but trust me, it is worth it(and so are you)!

Proverbs 31:11-12 Her husbands can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life.  She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life (okay, how about most days....does that seem more doable?)

Love you all-
Jen