Good Morning Girls!  Over the weekend I continued with day 30 and 31.  I did however take a break from writing.  This weekend I also read the book For Women Only By Shaunti Feldman.  I have heard a lot about it over the years, and finally sat down to read it.  It was a quick read. I highly recommend anyone who ever thinks "I don't understand how he can think, do, or say that", to read it.  Though I was not surprised about the things men think, I was surprised about the degree to which they think and act upon these things.  I also understand how a few "harmless" comments can break your mate.  On a reassuring note, it is just as easy to build them up once you know their language.  I believe I have a better understanding of "how to speak man", and I am putting it to practice.
There was of course a chapter on how men view, think, and need sex.  Yes, need sex.  Now I have heard this all before so I didn't think I would be surprised, yet I was.  I was surprised at how men are constantly bombarded by images of women all day.  I was surprised at how one image can stick with them for hours, days, even longer.  I was surprised to find out that many men have to consciously fight to get rid of the image, just like I have to fight to get the thought of brownies out of my mind!  Seriously, in her book, Shaunti describes being at a dinner party.  She says that if a beautiful woman walks in the man may never approach her, but he is consciously aware at all times that she is in the room.....just like she (Shaunti) is aware of dessert in the room, and has to purpose to not go seek it out!  Seriously....just think how skinny we all would be if we were wired for sex like we are "wired" for chocolate!  We would hang on to our husbands leg as they are leaving for work pleading "please don't go, just one more "slice".....I promise, then I will leave you alone for the rest of the day.....only to sneak back for more when the kids are napping!   I guess I just answered my own question.....if we were both wired the same way, nothing would ever get done!
Reading this book really helped me have more compassion for Tom.  When I read todays chapter in the Love Dare, instead of rolling my eyes, I thought "Alright, time for some chocolate"....in fact, I already did my "assignment" for today.  I figured if he is going to have an image of a woman in his mind today, it might as well be me! 

Assignment:
If at all possible, try to initiate sex with your husband or wife today.  Do this in a way that honors what your spouse has told you (or implied to you) about what they need from you sexually.  Ask God to make this enjoyable for both of you as well as a path to greater intimacy.

Questions:
Was this a satisfying experience for you?  If it didn't turn out the way you'd hoped, what do you think is complicating matters? Have you committed this to prayer? If it was a true blessing for both of you, what can you learn from this for the future?

Ecclesiastes 4:11  If two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone?

Have fun Girls-
Jen