What I Know vs. How I Feel
Hey Girls! There are days when I feel like Jesus and I are walking arm in arm all day long. I feel loved. I feel blessed. I feel like heaven is smiling upon me. Last Tuesday was one of those days. Oh how I love those days.........
And then there are days like today. Days where I feel as though Jesus must be busy walking arm in arm with everyone else and doesn't have time for me. Days where I feel hope slipping because one thing after another is falling apart before my very eyes. Days like today where I feel unlovable, unfaithful, and of course fat (that's my go-to negative feeling you know).
Not too long ago days like today could drag me deep into the pit at warp speed. I would start thinking all sorts of crazy thoughts and asking all kinds of questions like "What did I do wrong? Is God testing me or trying to teach me a lesson? Is this because I was thinking mean things about Tom last night? Is this because we did not go to church yesterday?"
On top of having all of these negative feelings I would torment myself with thoughts and imaginations about what I had done to deserve a craptastic day like today. It must somehow be my fault right?
But if that were true, wouldn't that also mean that on those days where I feel like Jesus and I are BFF's it was because of something I did right?
And if those two statements were true, doesn't that make the presence of the Lord all about me and not about Him?
And isn't that a dangerous, legalistic, (and completely wrong) view of Jesus?
How could you ever really trust someone who only agrees to be with you when you are on your best behavior? How could you truly trust someone who says "When you are good, I will love and protect you. When you are bad....well then good luck....you are on your own."
Yet that is often exactly how we view the Lord. We view Him by our feelings. We view Him by our circumstances. We view Him by our experiences in life. The problem is the fact that our feelings, circumstances, and experiences change from day to day. If we base our relationship with Jesus on these shifting piles of sand then our view of Jesus shifts with every wave that rolls in.
Jesus does not change. His love for us does not change. He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He died on the cross for you 2000 years ago and He would do it all over again for you today. You need to know that. KNOW that. As in "I feel as though Jesus is a million miles away from me today but I KNOW that He says in His Word that He will never abandon me (Joshua 1:5).....therefore I will cling to what I know and not how I feel".
Girls, that is why preachers, teachers, pastors, and ordinary Girls like me emphasize the importance of spending time in the Word. It is not a rule to make your lives burdensome. It is a lifeline. It is a place to go when your feelings, circumstances, and experiences leave you feeling like it is all your fault and you deserve what is happening to you. It is a hiding place to go to when the devil is telling you that you have used your last get out of jail free card. It is your safe house. It is your refuge. It is your hiding place. It is your place of Truth. It is what will get you through the craptastic days.......
And though I admit I cannot wait for this day to end, I find comfort in KNOWING that Jesus is with me and has been all day. I find comfort in KNOWING that He has good plans for me. I find comfort in KNOWING that the Lord is my Shepherd and He supplies all of my needs.
As far as my feelings go......they are just that......they are feelings (whoa....whoa....whoa.....feelings). They change from day to day, hour to hour, sometimes minute by minute.
Thank you Jesus for loving me consistently, constantly, and perfectly, all the days, hours, minutes, and even seconds of my life!!!!!
Psalm 16:8 I know the Lord is with me. I will not be shaken, for He is right beside me.
Love, Grace, and a Knowing wins over feeling day to you all-
Jen
And then there are days like today. Days where I feel as though Jesus must be busy walking arm in arm with everyone else and doesn't have time for me. Days where I feel hope slipping because one thing after another is falling apart before my very eyes. Days like today where I feel unlovable, unfaithful, and of course fat (that's my go-to negative feeling you know).
Not too long ago days like today could drag me deep into the pit at warp speed. I would start thinking all sorts of crazy thoughts and asking all kinds of questions like "What did I do wrong? Is God testing me or trying to teach me a lesson? Is this because I was thinking mean things about Tom last night? Is this because we did not go to church yesterday?"
On top of having all of these negative feelings I would torment myself with thoughts and imaginations about what I had done to deserve a craptastic day like today. It must somehow be my fault right?
But if that were true, wouldn't that also mean that on those days where I feel like Jesus and I are BFF's it was because of something I did right?
And if those two statements were true, doesn't that make the presence of the Lord all about me and not about Him?
And isn't that a dangerous, legalistic, (and completely wrong) view of Jesus?
How could you ever really trust someone who only agrees to be with you when you are on your best behavior? How could you truly trust someone who says "When you are good, I will love and protect you. When you are bad....well then good luck....you are on your own."
Yet that is often exactly how we view the Lord. We view Him by our feelings. We view Him by our circumstances. We view Him by our experiences in life. The problem is the fact that our feelings, circumstances, and experiences change from day to day. If we base our relationship with Jesus on these shifting piles of sand then our view of Jesus shifts with every wave that rolls in.
Jesus does not change. His love for us does not change. He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He died on the cross for you 2000 years ago and He would do it all over again for you today. You need to know that. KNOW that. As in "I feel as though Jesus is a million miles away from me today but I KNOW that He says in His Word that He will never abandon me (Joshua 1:5).....therefore I will cling to what I know and not how I feel".
Girls, that is why preachers, teachers, pastors, and ordinary Girls like me emphasize the importance of spending time in the Word. It is not a rule to make your lives burdensome. It is a lifeline. It is a place to go when your feelings, circumstances, and experiences leave you feeling like it is all your fault and you deserve what is happening to you. It is a hiding place to go to when the devil is telling you that you have used your last get out of jail free card. It is your safe house. It is your refuge. It is your hiding place. It is your place of Truth. It is what will get you through the craptastic days.......
And though I admit I cannot wait for this day to end, I find comfort in KNOWING that Jesus is with me and has been all day. I find comfort in KNOWING that He has good plans for me. I find comfort in KNOWING that the Lord is my Shepherd and He supplies all of my needs.
As far as my feelings go......they are just that......they are feelings (whoa....whoa....whoa.....feelings). They change from day to day, hour to hour, sometimes minute by minute.
Thank you Jesus for loving me consistently, constantly, and perfectly, all the days, hours, minutes, and even seconds of my life!!!!!
Psalm 16:8 I know the Lord is with me. I will not be shaken, for He is right beside me.
Love, Grace, and a Knowing wins over feeling day to you all-
Jen
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